Archive for the ‘Weapon’ Category

Short Porch in Right

Posted: February 20, 2011 in 1990, Games, Hank, Vic, Weapon
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One of the greatest players we ever had was Vic Ramirez.  Vic played for us in our first season in 1990.  Vic was a lefty, ran like a demon, had a great arm, and hit the shit out of the ball.  Vic had graduated from C.V in 1989 and was still eligible for one more season of Legion ball.  He had just played an entire season at Glendale College and started every game and did a great job for them as their lead-off hitter.  Vic wanted to play for the Glendale Legion team that season…but thanks to some great selling by Hank, Weapon, and BullOxen we ultimately ended up with “C’mon Vic” (as we nicknamed him) on our roster. 

One of our games in 1990 was at Chaminade High.  When we first got to the field everyone was eyeing their right field fence.  It was only 240 feet from home plate, but it had a net that acted as a “fence” that went straight UP about 70 feet in the air.  Vic was our only left handed hitter on the team.  The first guy I looked at when we all saw that fence was Vic.  He was drooling.  You knew what was going on inside his head………

“Don’t even think about it” I said.

Vic smiled and said “Don’t worry Gee….nothing but two irons today.”

We were having problems with some of our hitters….alot of guys were dropping their hands when the pitch was on the way and trying to jack the ball over the fence or everyone’s heads………and it wasn’t working.  This is where the term “two irons” came around.  If you’ve ever hit a perfect shot in Golf with a two iron you know what I’m talking about.  A two iron is a low, penetrating shot that goes a LONG way.  I kept telling the hitters that year…”let’s go…lots of two irons today.”

I still knew what he was thinking.  And if I was in his shoes I knew what I would be thinking.  That short porch in right field was a little too tempting…..

And sure enough…the first pitch of the game….Vic drops his hands and tries to jack it over that fence.  He golfed a high towering routine fly ball.  The ball went 241 feet for a home run.  Everybody came out of the dugout laughing.  In fact…everyone was laughing EXCEPT for GEE.  When he came around third with his homerun trot I didn’t even high-five him.  Everybody was out at the plate congratulating Vic but Hank and Weap were looking over at me and giggling because they knew I was pissed.  I was just down there shaking my head but the players still knew I was happy we had a 1-0 lead.  I tried to act pissed but it wasn’t working.

One thing about Vic…he was a great kid.  He came up to me the next inning and said “sorry Gee….just two irons from now on.”

So his next at-bat he laces a two-iron right into the net in right field.  The right fielder knew just how to play it and damn near threw Vic out at first.  Time to re-think my little scheme…………

Next time before Vic came up I called him over and said “All right…you get a hall pass for the day….just golf it over the fucking fence.”  All I know is that this game had quickly turned into a shootout and we needed runs any way we could get ’em.

Vic got a big smile on his face.  He tried about three more times that day but couldn’t golf another one outta there but he did hit another one off of that screen that almost made it.  I was learning a lesson as a coach that day.  Actually, as a coach you are always learning something.  The lesson was simple….JUST LET ‘EM PLAY.

We held on to win that day 16-12………recording the final out of the game with the BASES LOADED and a power-hitting lefty from Chaminade at the plate who was eyeballing that short-porch too!!!!!!!

“It was me….”

Posted: February 16, 2011 in 1993, BullOxen, Games, General, Hank, Rags/Trash Talk, Weapon
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It was no secret that I liked to run kind of a “loose ship” at Verdugo.  I was smoking cigarettes in the dugout.  We always had our official Gatorade cooler filled with some nice cold water.  Oranges were always in the dugout.   I allowed Jess Rogers to set up shop IN our dugout making snowcones for everyone.   Even though the league had very tough rules on tobacco use on the field and in the dugout, I never got caught by the umpires smoking.  The rule was simple if you were caught…immediate ejection from the game.

I even let our players chew tobacco.  Some of the guys had that thing going on where you get a chaw going and then wrap it in bubblegum.  I used to chew, but by the time I was managing our team my chewing days were long gone.  It had been at least 10 years since I had chewed.

In ’93 we were playing a game on a Saturday at Birmingham High.  Birmingham always had a weak team, but this season they were winning a few games here and there and were starting to get a little “uppity.”  Anyways, one of their guys came up in the first inning and bombed a home run off Garrett Lee, giving them  2-0 lead.  It was the bottom of the first inning and they were celebrating like they had just won the World Series.  We just kind of laughed at them and by the eighth inning we had opened up an 11-2 lead…and I had knocked their pitcher out of the game.  Wait a minute you say?  I knocked him out of the game?  Yes I did. 

We all know about the importance of “the short hop” but from the third base coaching box you can’t be short-hopping EVERYONE.  You gotta kind of pick your spots.  If I couldn’t do a blatant SHORT HOP at someone…I would usually toss back to the pitcher what I called my “Tough Knuckler.”   Well, a foul ball came over my way around the 5th inning after we had been knocking their starter around and I decided to fire that “Tough Knuckler” at the pitcher.  It was the mother of all knucklers.  I had screwed around with knucklers my whole life and this may have been the ONLY one that actually “knuckled.”  Well, it knuckled so well that he couldn’t catch it…it hit him in his right kneecap…and he had to come out of the game.  I really don’t think the knuckler hurt him as bad as the battering our hitters were giving this guy.  Let’s face it..he WANTED out of the game.  But put it down in the books…..I was the guy who delivered the official knockout punch. 

The boys at Birmingham were getting a little upset.  They had to find SOME WAY to win this game, and it wasn’t going to happen on the field.  So one of their coaches goes to the ump and tells him that we had guys chewing tobacco in the dugout.  Sure enough, the umpire comes over to our dugout to see if there was any “evidence” of chaw.  The whole dugout was filled with spit all over the ground.  Forensic tests were not needed on this one…we were BUSTED.  The ump said “who’s been chewing?”

“It was me”……….I said.

“You did all of this?” he asked.  “You could have been sitting here for two days and not spit that many times.”

“Well, I was doing it, too” ……….announced General.

Then Hank pipes up “Yeah, so did I.”

Weapon followed up with “Okay, you got me….I was doing it, too.”

BullOxen said…….”Yeah, it was me.”

The funny thing that was happening here was that NONE of the coaches had chewed.  Well, except for maybe BullOxen.  But we all stepped up to account for the mess in the dugout and to protect any players from getting tossed out of the game.  Totally unorchestrated, every coach instinctively took the bullet for the other guys.  Anyways, the ump BELIEVED our story and threw all five coaches out of the game.  Automatic forfeiture of the game.  No coaches left.  This set off an immediate dogpiling from the Birmingham team.  They had defeated us and now they were rubbing it in……

But wait a minute!!!!!!!  There JUST HAPPENED to be a couple of old codgers there from Post 288 who were there watching our team play that day.  In fact…ONE OF THEM was actually listed on the official paperwork of our team (that I just so happened to have with me that day) as the DE FACTO Manager of our team!!!  That’s right…’Ol Dave Haskell was there and had to come on the field for the final few innings to guide the team to victory.  The umps were really disappointed that Haskell was there.  And the boys from Birmingham had to break up their little dogpile and get back on the field and finish off the whoopin’ we were giving them.  And all five coaches who were thrown out of the game got to sit in the stands and take it all in.  The boys at Birmingham were now STARING DOWN Haskell.  They were not happy.  Hank said something to the Birmingham dugout like “we’ve got some bad news………HE DOESN’T CHEW!!!” 

Haskell knew nothing about baseball, and was the first to admit it.  This made it even more hilarious.  He was hamming it up down in the third base box…giving signs to our players that had no meaning.  Haskell, probably about 75 years old at the time, was rubbing it right back in Birmingham’s collective faces……and he was loving every minute of it.

Haskell was a drill sergeant in the Army.  After the game he went into full drill-sarge mode….which scared the hell out of a few of our players.  “Pay attention now I’m talking to you!!” he barked at the team.  I’ll never forget the look on Cowsill’s face!!  It was like…holy shit!!! 

“Now!!” Haskell said “I want you all to say right now WE’RE THE BEST!!!”

A few guys said “We’re the best”

It wasn’t loud enough for Haskell…….”I said I want to hear you say WE’RE THE BEST!!!”  He looked like a real drill sarge.  Scary…mouth open…sizing people up….daring someone to challenge his authority.  Moving in close on people acting like he was about to grab them and kick their ass if they didn’t do it.  Everyone got the message.

“WE’RE THE BEST!!!!!!!!”

“Say it again” he barked.

“WE’RE THE BEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Haskell had everyone…including me, all jacked-up and screaming “WE’RE THE BEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

It was so loud the Birmingham players and coaches were really starting to get pissed about it.

God that was a great day…………

Verdugo ALWAYS gets in the last word……….AND the last laugh!!!!!!!!!!!!

“They burned their bodies”

Posted: December 23, 2010 in 1992, Behind the Scenes, Hank, No Way!, Weapon
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by Colin James

I have finally met with the coach of this baseball team.  This was our second interview and we couldn’t even get past the first question before I was inspired to write.  All I asked him was the following:  “So just what was it about this team that made it so special?”

He said “They did all the little things that you hoped a team would do.  On the field and off the field, too.  They hung around together, they were always picking each other up, they were looking to slide headfirst, they went in hard to break up double-plays, they were looking to dive and make spectacular plays, they talked a lot of shit,  they dogpiled, they burned their bodies, they…..”

“Stop!” I asked in disbelief…….”Did you just say that they burned their bodies?”

A smile lit up his face.  “Yes” he said, “they burned their bodies.”  Now he was laughing.

“What on earth are you talking about?” I asked.

“I can’t remember the exact date it happened,” he said.  “It was either the night after a win that had clinched our first playoff spot or it was after we had made a furious rally to beat Fat Jody in the playoffs”

Before I asked him just who “Fat Jody” was I had to ask “They burned their bodies?”

“Let’s just say we were celebrating that win in typical Verdugo fashion.  I went straight home and started pounding celebratory beers and some of the players showed up.  Maybe except for four or five guys everyone was there.  We were all drinking beer and smoking cigars.  I think it was Hank who started the whole thing.  I walked outside and there he was, standing there with a cigar in his left hand.  He reached that cigar across his chest to his right arm and was burning a mark in his right arm.  If he had pushed that cigar any harder into his arm he would have knocked the quarter-sized cherry off of it.  He was basically branding himself.    He held it there for about 30 seconds.   You could smell the flesh burning.  Smoke was just coming off his arm.  He still has that “gar”-burn mark today.  I think six or seven guys did it.”

“They were so happy with the win that they BRANDED themselves with cigars?” I asked.

“Fucking -A.  That’s exactly what they did.  Hank started doing it and it was kind of contagious.  Next thing you know like six or seven guys were doing it….all trying to outdo the other as to how long they could hold it on there while it burned.  Nobody held it on there longer than The Weapon.  In fact, Weap held it on there SO LONG that about a week later he had to go to the hospital.”

My God man, I thought to myself!  “And what happened to The Weapon?” I asked.

“He branded himself right in that spot where people slit their wrists, you know?  Well, apparently it got infected and a purple line was moving up his arm from the spot where he had branded himself with the gar.  You should let Weap tell you the story at the reunion……..I promise you WON’T stop laughing the way he tells it.”

“Did you also brand yourself that night?” I asked.

“I would have”…..he said………”but I was just too drunk.  But that’s what you gotta love about our program.  We didn’t work hard and play hard.  We played hard and played hard!”

And here I was thinking that this is something one would do IF and ONLY IF they were too drunk.  My God, I thought to myself……..I wish I could have seen this team play!

Were YOU one of the folks who “Burned their bodies?”…………….if so , please comment and tell us what it felt like (if you even remember).  Better yet take a picture of it and send it to us here at the blog and we’ll be happy to show the world your official “Verdugo Gar-Burn”!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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